Tap Into Self-Love to Make Everyday a Celebration

I am celebrating me today.

For the past many years, when my birthday rolls around, I tell people that I am going to celebrate for the same number of days as my age. They look at me with a bit of shock, as if I am being self-centered or indulgent, or that I’m going on some wild, irresponsible binge.

But that is not what I mean.

Celebrating me means making time for the people and activities that make my life pleasurable—that light me up!. It’s ensuring that I make space for friend time or treat myself to that special coffee I enjoy. It means wearing a favorite outfit, luxuriating in warm bubble bath, or spending quiet moments reading on the deck. It is journaling under the moon, or rising with the sun.

I honor the uniqueness of me.

There was a time I didn’t do that. At all. In fact, I remember being asked some years ago about my dreams. What did I enjoy? What did I long for? I didn’t have an answer. I wasn’t sure. My wishes had never been a priority—I was busy doing what I “should,” what was expected, what someone else wanted..

I realized I had lost a vital connection with myself. Buried under the years of “shoulds” and “musts” and “people-pleasing” were parts of me that had been ignored—hidden under limiting messages about working hard and being frivolous, that held shame around sexuality, judgments about appearance, and the eternal need to “be nice.” I had been well trained—socially conditioned—to follow the rules, do what I was “supposed to,” and take care of those around me.

Looking back, I see that I had clearly fallen into a state of mind classified in mental health books as “anhedonia.” It is defined as “a loss of interest or pleasure in all or almost all usual activities and pastimes.” I had given up on pleasure. I wasn’t finding life to be fun.

It took me some time to reconnect. The programming ran deep. Making time for me and creating space for activities that gave me pleasure seemed self-indulgent and selfish.

I have learned that self-care and the pursuit of pleasure is NOT about ego or selfishness or irresponsibility. It is NOT about caring for my needs and being oblivious to every one else’s. There is no pleasure in hurting or disregarding someone I care about—that is a choice I don’t make unless I have to.

I simply have discovered that when I am in touch with my inner voice and take action to care for myself, I am best able to attend to, care for, love, and celebrate life with those around me. I am happier and they are happier, too.

By taking care of myself, I fill a reservoir that allows me to give to others and that carries me through challenging times.

So I honor me today, and not just on my birthday. I do things that make me happy, that bring me pleasure. I reach for the good, no matter what the circumstances. I make choices that support my wellbeing. I say “No,” to people and activities that are detrimental and draining. I say “Yes” to people and activities that nourish me. I speak my truth. I listen to my instincts. I celebrate and own my unique gifts.

Today, I revel in my fabulousness, as well as my flaws. I know that I am imperfectly perfect.

Most importantly, I am me.

So, I celebrate me today. And I will again tomorrow, and the next day.